I chuckled so well done.
Ok, this topic overused. Every second video uploaded onto any site is 'comedy' complaining about new layouts or famous people. No movement besides the mouth of your crudely drawn characters. Badly drawn animation is actually acceptable on the internet but then you need to make your character move. That is my minor in my opinion. If you expected people to watch this because of the humour then you're mistaking. Write a script and spend some time on it to do clever word play and the acting isn't too good either, even for comedy. Flow into your words like you're having a conversation, it feels really forced as if you've read it off a script or made it up with uncertainty at the last moment. So here are my points...
1) More movement
2) Other topics example.
Humour Story, Funny side of daily activities, Puns or Dry humour, animate jokes you heard. Just please...not this Google+ shit.
Don't just assume your first script is good because it's usually the worst one you come up with
4) Voice Acting
Practice by replicating successful comedians until you eventually find your own style.
Thank you that was actully VERY helpful. Thank you very much
The storytelling alone deserves a five
Thanks a bunch!
I watched Twitter Tag Team which led me to this one, which is way better. It's different and I laughed. Improvements...well, for the sake of comedy there's no need.
I'm going to be harsh here. PLEASE don't waste your great animation on cheap jokes. I know it's all in the name of harmless comedy, which gets old after a while and in turns translates into boring. You're an animator...you can do way better than ZING, I see what you did there, famous blogger insults and memes.
Evaluate life and circumstances, complain in a comedic way and if you have a cheap ZING joke, find a better way to present it then
Everything is done well. Except for the other door being behind another door, it feels as if there was potential to do a pretty funny punchline that isn't so predictable predictable. Like a spyro finding his wife cheating behind that door or something...I don't know
Animation, sound, story and background art is good, brilliant perhaps (Above average standards of Newgrounds). Ok, now why did I give it four stars? Because it feels like the directing was missing, as if something is rushed but I can't quite make out what. Voice acting isn't bad...but it feels like there's no passion involved (Like everyone just rambled their lines to get it done). Some shots are predictable and added for effect which doesn't enhance the story in any way shape or form, it bores the audience unless it's for comedic timing. Spending hours animating something that wasn't planned in detail is a waste of time (Just my opinion) but your art is great. My apologies if I came off as harsh.
Buy a Zoom H4N...it's used on many professional film sets nowadays at a price everybody can afford. It's like a sound studio in your hand and it took the art of sound recording by storm... I'm a sound enthusiast studying it.
It is very apparent that you love telling stories. It was entertaining and the style fits the only bad thing is that if the story starts fading then you have nothing to compensate for it like art. Like the comment below me mentioned...it does remind me of the Discworld novels by Terry Pratchett...it might inspire you to expand on your stories
5/5 for the animation and time you spent creating it. 1/5 for the story. Ok, the animation is great and the constant moving pictures keeps our attention but it can only go so far. Pitch together and work on a decent script by chopping and changing things. Overall it's good and would love to see more...story
Thanks for the review. I'm working out the best use of the character at the moment, it is hard to make a narrative with a clear story without dialogue, I've been adding facial expressions to him and trying to come up with funny situations to put him into rather than trying to make full on narratives as a lot of the reviews I've got are stating that the story doesn't make sense. It's still early days so I'm fairly sure he will find himself. Keep a lookout because there is more coming!
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